…I mean a big Hugh Hefner sized gob of the stuff.

It’s confirmed that I have my job. Hooray. But now I have to trek down to London on Thursday to deliver my CRB goods (passport, insurance docs, something else) in person to the CRB application officer. Did I mention I live in the Midlands and have I job I want to be paid for this month. Bah!

Don’t get me wrong, I want this job – but I got to tell you, these hoops are getting annoying. Still, looking forward to London – it’s calling.

Anyway, today the kids WOULD NOT STOP SCREAMING. I mean, seriously screaming. They’re not my kids (cos after today, i’d hammer two six inch rivets through my testicles before I seeded any little brat), but they were someones – and that someone was IN THE CENTRE AT THE TIME. Also, the staff were doing fuck all to actually appease the little kid.

Me and my mate kinda made up, she’s just under a lot of stress. She acknowledged that we are kinda close since we’ve been chatting for the last six months pretty much daily. Besides, the neuroses are mine (not that she doesn’t have them, she totally does, but she refuses to acknowledge their importance – or beauty). Fuck it, i’m blathering.

Tomorrow is another day – hopefully it’ll just be a Larry Flynt sized gob of wank…

ate too much cow…

om nom nom nom

I kinda left you hanging the other day, Peanut…

I called the centre in Camden to say that i’d have to decline the post, cos it was 0.45FTE and someone had clearly fucked the dog (who knows, it may have been me). I said, i’m really sorry and I wished them luck. I got a call soon after to say “Please don’t decline yet, we’re looking at options”. Eyebrows in raised mode, I followed the caller’s instructions. Turns out that I didn’t just impress them at my interview, I blew them away; they really want me, and are willing to make the post a full time position. For the first time in ages, I feel wanted.

What i’m waiting on now is a confirmation that the post will now become full-time. Once I have that, i’ll be ecstatic and then the really hard work begins.

In other news, I got my car. She is an ABSOLUTE beaut! Nippy, controllable, a joy to drive, nice looker and a good colour. I love it! Getting a fancy stereo put into it next week, cos i’m an idiot who likes music! I’ve been driving it pretty much non-stop since I got it.

The exception to my driving marathon was last night, when I went to Wolves to see Rafe and Eda. Was a good night, but I was shattered. It’s been a tough week, full of tough things and tough emotions. I felt drained. We went to an Indian restuarant, wasn’t great – they laughed at my choice, but it would have been so much better. Instead we went to this place that looked fancy from the outside, but was pretty crap on the inside, and the food wasn’t fantastic at all. This morning, someone I thought I was close to kinda hit me with a low blow when she said that “I don’t know anything about her” – I know more than she thinks; but if i’m wrong about that, then it’s confirmation that i’m not really close to anything in this world. Maybe I SHOULD stay on the fringe, but i’ve been there and it’s not fun.

Anyway my life seems to be getting better; let’s hope it stays on this path.

Spk sn. Oh, and fuck all the X factor BS in the news – news is news, keep it that way.

I have to get to my current less-than-cool job, so i’ll tell you later.

So happy!

AND I get my car today. Mustn’t forget my driving glasses…

…was too good to be true!

I fucked up. That job I got, you know the one that my hopes and dreams were rested on? Yeah, it’s part time – a 0.4 FTE. Fuck!

I know it didn’t say that in the advert, but i’ll never know. SHIT! PISS! BOLLOCKS!

But the strange thing is, i’m not half as cut up about it as I thought. It’s also made some other bad feelings seem less significant. How does that work?

I’ve applied for 8 jobs today in a kind of kneejerk reaction to finding out that when it rains, it’s usually life pissing in my face. But when life gives you lemons, all you can do is break out the tequila, Peanut…

Adios…

I’m really just deadweight at work now.

It’s not really my fault. There is far too much in this post to ever be justified by its awful salary. The fact that I have another lined up in London has just made me become comatosed.

Will not sleep properly til I get my official offer letter through. Then my new life begins in the New Year; how exciting…

Well, off to work.

Why can I not get her out of my head?

Well it’s been an interesting few days, Peanut…

On Friday, I had a job interview in London at a day centre for people with learning difficulties. And I got it!!! Pretty crazy, huh? I shared the moment I found out with the girl that I have a big thing for (although I think the reason I have a thing for her is because she reminds me of this fantastic girl who I never had the courage to ask out, and is now a really good mate, but who now has a long-term boyfriend – bugger). Anyway – i’m moving to London, and i’m terrified.

It was also my birthday on Saturday – I spent it with Eda and Rafe; they really are awesome – especially Eda, she’s just a fantastic laugh. We went to grab munch on the  Saturday, hung out, watched some ridiculous movie and Eda got drunk on 3 shots (yes 3) of vodka!!! Funny shit.

Eda and I then went to B’ham on sunday, where she interrogated me on my love woes – which was really uncomfortable for more reasons than I was willing to go into on the day, or now even.

Well, now i’m back in Cov and I wish I was somewhere else. On the plus side, i’m rewatching Dead Like Me – one of my fave shows ever. Watch it. It’s awesome – Ellen Muth is cute, brilliant and beautiful in a sarcastic, caustic, ordinary but not kinda way.

http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0348913/

Anyway – i’m still really down – but life is looking up. Hopefully i’ll wake up, realise it and be happy. For now – well…

Was much better! I’ve got a car! It’s a Focus, and it’s beautiful!

Only £3000, and 35000 miles on the clock. Bargain!!!!!

London’s calling…

I have been in a ridiculously foul mood. I mean like totally foul.

However, with new car and hopefully new job on the way – maybe life is on the up.

The two girls I like are still spoken for and not really interested, respectively. But never mind; i’d say it’s their loss, but at this point in time it probably isn’t. I just wish I could feel good about myself, then I wouldn’t keep torturing myself over what amounts to unrequited love for one girl, and a simple, almost immature crush for another. I’m 25 for fucks sake, i’m supposed to be over this kind of crap! Yet here we are.

Just thought, it’s my birthday weekend this weekend and guess who i’ve arranged to see! XD

Ballsacks.